I opened up the mail today and received a request from the county to renew our foster care license.
A few thoughts ran through my head.
- Yay! I love foster care and can’t wait to sign up for another three years!
- Hmm. Do they really need me to re-up? I’ve been waiting for a child to be placed long-term in our home for four months.
- Yikes! My work is looking at transferring me next summer. Is it responsible to accept a long-term placement if we’re not available for more than one year?
If there’s anything learned in the past three years as a foster mom, it’s to accept that my feelings will always be all over the map when it comes to foster care.
There will be days when I want to do more than can humanly be done, saying yes to every request for volunteers for our foster parent association. And days I want to lay snuggled in my bed ignoring the paperwork that needs filing and the calls that need to be made.
There will be happy days when I am shocked and awed by the progress made by my foster children and their parents. And dark moments when despair creeps in and I doubt that difficult circumstances can be overcome.
There will be many wonderful memories of time spent with awesome kids picking apples or searching for fossils at the beach or hiking in the woods. And there will be tears when it’s time to say goodbye as they move back home.
But one thing is always constant. I love these kids. For their courage, their silliness, for just being them.
Guess it’s time to fill out that paperwork to renew our foster care license.